Suicide Girls Making a Killing Off Gamers

When I was in college, I worked at a Japanese toy store. Fan boys would approach me to pay, but somehow decided to first show off the pictures in their wallet. Nope, no photos of pets, family members, or girlfriends; instead, I saw their favorite anime characters scantily clad in bikinis and lingerie. This made me realize a trend amongst hot illustrations and the people that love them.

If it were an equation, I think it would read something like this: disproportionate fictional chick + least amount of clothing possible = ultimate dork hotness. Seems like a Suicide Girl realized this, too, in one of her video game-inspired shoots.

The Grand Theft Auto series has been notorious for its masturbatory depravity; in the most recent installment, for example, the players can blatantly get lap dances and pick up prostitutes for some good times. Considering all of this overt sexuality, the next logical step was practically imminent. Is it really any wonder that somebody took the likeness of GTA IV’s “covergirl” Lola and went naked with it? Honestly, what shocks me most is that nobody thought of this earlier—along with the fact that this model named “Bob” is really a woman.

Some games seem like less likely candidates for pornification, but upon further research, I discovered that Halo 3 was the target of an SG shoot. And to be honest it made my brain hurt a little. I pondered (maybe a bit too much) what other video game vixens could meet the same fate as these characters; my musings quickly turned to…which ones couldn’t? Even wholesome Princess Peach isn’t safe.

After I hypothesized that no character—male, female, or otherwise—was porn-proof, I chatted with my friend Vivid, who’s both an avid gamer and a Suicide Girl. “It’s known that I am an utter gaming dork,” she said, “Either I’m playing members on Xbox Live or chatting up on my blog about my scores.” In regards to possibly doing a game-related photo shoot, she said, “My dream is to one day do a SG shoot based off of Katamari Damacy. How hilarious would that be? Or maybe I could get naked while rocking out to Rock Band/Guitar Hero? I’ll have to get on that.” Katamari Damacy?!? Really? This clearly proved my theory beyond all doubt.

With a multitude of abnormally “perfect,” hypersexualized females in games/anime/comics/etc., one can easily see that they can become fetishized in the eyes of those that are less-than-lucky in the girl department—heck, even those that aren’t. In a strange way, the fact that these girls are fictional almost makes them more attainable. The bounds of reality don’t constrain their fantasies, creating a bizarre sense of “ownership.” Consequently, I think risqué game-themed photo shoots are a wise business move for SG, and I predict they will become even more prevalent over time. Super Smash Girls, anyone?