No Character Is An Island: Marooned With An All-Star Cast

Apparently, there are people out there willing to judge my net worth as a person based upon which five CDs I would bring with me if I got stranded on a desert island. Or which five pop-stars I’d bring along for company. Or pretty much any arbitrary list of five items I’d want in tow if I found myself marooned at one of the far corners of the world…

Because I’d rather be judged on the merits of my favorite hobby than on those of my music collection (Weird Al is still culturally relevant, right?), here’s a list of the five video game characters I’d want around should our helicopter do a nosedive into some uncharted island.

Trying to survive while stranded isn’t easy, so I’ve divvied up the workload into equal shares. And I’ve also thought long and hard about any problems I may have with my new island-mates…

Mario
From: Super Mario Bros.
Main Responsibility: Rustlin’ up some grub
Only reason I may not want him around: He can fly, so it’s not like he’s going to stick around any longer than he has to. Dick…

Solid Snake
From: Metal Gear Solid
Main Responsibility: Tending to the wounded/Fixing the helicopter
Only reason I may not want him around: He keeps using his stealth camoflauge to convince Mario the island is haunted…

Faith
From: Mirror’s Edge
Main Responsibility: Exploring the island
Only reason I may not want her around: All she wants to talk about is her tragic past…

Guy Driving an SCV
From: StarCraft
Main Responsibility: Building shelter
Only reason I may not want him around: Whenever he’s out of building materials, he uses the helicopter’s loudspeaker system to tell the whole island about it…

Pikachu
From: Pokémon
Main Responsibility: Distracting large predators so everyone else can escape/Backup food source
Only reason I may not want him around: Come to think of it, I don’t know of a reason I DO…

Yep. Good, solid list of companions.

Couldn’t ask for a better group to struggle against the elements with.

We’re not gonna make it to morning…